Charmed Rewind

In the far future of 2009, Phoebe foresees her own fiery death! The audience learns a powerful lesson about dog doo.

Maggie does Flashdance, Mel apparently loves snuff videos, and Macy continues her backslide into the most boring character. Jordan is inspirational.(This is a reupload, Spotify deleted a bunch of episodes for some reason)

How far back can we rewind? How about to the Unaired Pilot? Join us as we go back to the beginning and learn about generic 90s men in sweaters, Darryl with a personality, and the Phoebe before Phoebe. (This is a reupload, Spotify deleted a bunch of episodes for some reason)

The Charmed Ones step into the ring with some demonic WCW wrestlers, Piper steals souls, and Ron Perlman rips off Phantasm. (This is a reupload, for some reason this was taken off of Spotify??)

Somehow, this wasn't on Spotify?? Anyway, this was the podcast where Phelan and I angrily stopped watching the Charmed Reboot.

Biker Prue totally ruins Piper and Leo's wedding. Meanwhile, Cole wonders how he's supposed to feel at any point in this episode.

The Source is brought back for five minutes so he can go out incredibly lamely. Meanwhile, everyone is the worst they've ever been.

Tobin Bell stops by to play a game with the Charmed Ones. Meanwhile, Piper casually thinks about stealing crackers from a dead woman.

The girls become stupid superheroes. Mark Sheppard shows up.

Cole summons the Spirit of Rage to redundantly make the girls fight. But his true love for Phoebe wins out when he sees her do a silly penguin walk!

In Charmed's thrilling 100th episode, Cole creates an alternate reality in which Phoebe hates him, Piper is violent and bitter, and Paige might as well not exist. So, it's not much different.

The Charmed Ones are visited by their beloved Aunt Gail, who dies horribly to barely a shrug.

Prue goes undercover as a sexy assassin and seduces Antonio Sabato Jr! Meanwhile, Barbas stares at a clock.

Cole returns for the underwhelming 150th episode spectacular! Meanwhile, Q is a trucker.

The girls find a demon baby and must confront the classic debate of nature vs. nurture. Or not! Darryl becomes invincible as an aside.

Prue, Piper, and Phoebe travel back in time to stop their mom from very easily giving up their powers to a warlock. Grams hilariously flings them out a door.

Antonio Sabato Jr. shows up to kidnap Prue. Prue says that he's a dreamer, but he's not the only one.

In the most predictable career trajectory you can imagine, Piper becomes Death.

Prue dies, and Alyssa Milano rejoices. Meanwhile, Cole sleeps on some hay.

Robert Englund stops by to shrink the girls. Leo heals a neon sign.

The Charmed Ones must face a goofy looking demon guy and their most powerful adversary yet: Neighbor Jenny wanting to borrow tampons.

Piper is sent to JAIL. Phoebe puts on lip liner.

Phoebe becomes her high school self, and by that I mean she wears a long wig and acts pretty much the same.

Billie finds a superhero belt that puts her in a sexy costume, because sexism is over. Phoebe has dates, lots and lots of dates.

Phoebe casts a smart spell on herself. She must rescue her sisters from a painting before she becomes stupid again.

Grandma Ghost is summoned to hate on men, and also annoy a necromancer who's just minding his own business.

The Headless Horseman shows up to introduce the girls to their Harry Potter knockoff school.

The Charmed Ones achieve world peace: by killing.

The Charmed Ones complain for 45 minutes while an Alice in Wonderland themed plot happens in the background.

Phoebe is haunted by her 1920s self, who looks like her present self, because past lives are just your relatives, and also Neighbor Dan is their great grandfather.

A creepy man with no game at all haunts Prue's dreams. Meanwhile, Piper and Phoebe go on dates. Darryl will never doubt Andy again.

Chris is turned into Spider-man because of daddy issues. The Charmed Ones ignore this because of dates and work.

Grandma Ghost is miraculously resurrected just so she can be comically eaten by a wolf. Phoebe dons the infamously terrible Cinderella Dress.

It's the Mirror Universe with the Halliwells, where Leo has stupid hair, Darryl DOES want to know, and Piper is pretty much the same.

The girls are confronted by the innocents they didn't save. So, all of them. The promo pretends this is a comedy.

Lazy Leo eats chips. There's a plot about the seven deadly sins in this episode also.

Tiny Bangs Phoebe does Cole a big favor by telling him to move on and go to Hell, please. Bruce Campbell wonders why he's here.

Phoebe's dream man steps out of a 50s monster movie. The audience is left to wonder what the Demon of Illusion meant when he said "and then there were two."

Wyatt shrinks down Piper and Leo and traps them in a dollhouse. Meanwhile, Zankou has a dumb plan that hinges on him never checking if someone is in the house or not.

Wyatt summons a dragon because Piper is dumb and won't bind his powers.

The Crone plans to steal the Charmed One's baby by using a monkey to steal their senses or something? Brian Krause is bored on set.

Prue and Cole go back to the old west to hate flirt and maybe save Phoebe if there's time.

David Carradine shows up with stupid hair to trap the girls within a time loop. Hilarious death ensues. Also Andy I guess.

Phoebe is a horrible monster who chooses to be evil and tries to gaslight everyone later. Meanwhile, Cole uses Netscape to shop for baby toys.

Paige steals the Book of Shadows to help other people, which is personal gain I guess so she gets big boobs. Piper turns into another sexy costume because grief.

The Charmed Ones suck so bad they get put on trial. Darryl is on death row. The promo thinks this is sexy?

Phoebe is turned into a genie and Chris is surprised to find out that breaking up his parents before he was born could have negative consequences.

The Charmed Ones' dreams come to life when they totally fail to save the Sandman from death. Leo is pregnant as an aside.

Piper is put into a coma by some fruit, so Prue and Phoebe animate a ninja toy and it goes around killing people. Neighbor Dan fetches the sodas.

It's the iconic first appearance of the Charmed One's greatest enemy: Barbas! Billy Drago appears once every 1300 years to be easily defeated by an ADR line. Phoebe finds a ladybug.